Monday, December 28, 2009

hard sleep

missing olympia and craving lil wayne cake

Thursday, December 24, 2009


TV eyes, abide

You would think a resort would mean you have a lot to do; actually it means you just have to make do with whatever's there. I've watched more television in these few days than I have in the last year (to be fair, this past year I've watched none). I tried to watch TV online. Even the short story I read involved TV. But I did make some OK pizza and am cooling some vanilla lemon flan. We also went on a walk through the snow-covered woods, which was actually quite boring and silent and maybe the nicest thing to do here exactly for those reasons.

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Monday, December 21, 2009

Correspondent "E" reporting from Big White, B.C.:

A long inconsequential day of chairbound travel, through sky and air and haze. A bento at Vancouver International Airport. Our short flight from Vancouver to Kelowna was on SkyWest, and was exceedingly more comfortable than American. Kelowna, aside from its misty Northwestern brow, looks much like Dallas, or any other highway city in the US.

It turns out that single airport meal wasn't food, it was a fight; my body thought I was a boxer and seized up my abdomen; I was pummelled from the inside. So today, no skiing, just too much TV (Amazonian cuisine and the latest celebrity deaths), soda and soup.

I was actually quite pleased upon discovering this:

Tomorrow I may even go out!

Sunday, December 20, 2009

tonight i saw death and his wife
but when they turned back into trees
i think

why do men that have nothing in common with me want to date me? I read a strangers tarot today. he was in the army and likes dutch landscape paintings. he told me this after i read his cards and found out he was desperate for love and his family was miserable and his life would soon turn to chaos and a big change would occur but he might have to come close to death for it to happen.

anyway somehow this stirred something in his heart and he asked me out. (this was of course after i told him i was a surrealist, too young and raised anti military.) and i think, am i the shallow one?

Saturday, December 19, 2009

This is correspondent "E" reporting from the field, recently dropped fully dazed into the dry heart of Dallas/Fort Worth, Texas.

My first visit to the lone star state can be typified nicely by my first breakfast here -- mostly pale and ambiguous, white with touches of brown. We ate at a local diner, called, actually, "Local Diner." Coffee was weak, hashbrowns were potato-like, eggs egg-like, bacon bacon-like, and gravy as ghostly as air. I played the jukebox, which surprisingly, actually used 45s and didn't take credit cards, while staring at quaint portraiture of James Dean, Marilyn Monroe, and Charlie Chaplin (looking slightly mistemporaneous). It took me back to the golden old 50's...30's...something.

There is a lot of highway here. There is no terrain to speak of, making it nearly impossible to orient yourself, since the only other possible landmarks are buildings, which are either glass-walled corporate offices, malls, or chain restaurants. Driving along, I found myself emotionally identifying with businesses that included names of friends.

Empty stomachs eventually led me and my family to Denton's El Matador. I've never seen hard-shelled or rolled-up tacos in a Mexican restaurant, but apparently it's possible here. I've also never been to a thrift store where everything is security-tagged.

This is the end of my report. You'll next hear from me in the partially-tamed wilderness beyond the border, hopefully knee-deep in snow.

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Yesterday this Mars resident was found in a very strange situation when a beefy social security officer asked hir out on account of hir's nice teeth. Now our blind item has "Danny's" number and a weird weird feeling.

And to everyone else: remember don't forget to buy a treat for yourself or you'll regret it later when all you want is a cookie but all you have is beans.

Sunday, December 6, 2009


1111 days til the end of the world.

i just got done playing with some synthesizers all by myself.

windy and cold day
warmer in little danang
hot and sour and full

december will be magic again.

E and I made a back drop Christmas tree will appear soon.

Friday, December 4, 2009


in class yesterday everyone had to present a short proposal for a hypothetical documentary we wanted to shoot. this one kid presented his 'participatory' documentary pitch titled I am Supervillain, or something, in which he elaborates plans to disrupt olympia by creating crimes that could be described as "national tragedies." he said, having grown up reading comics and shit, he'd want to explore the idea of creating a real-life supervillain, and seeing if a real-life superhero would arise. this whole proposal was done simply for laughs, i assume. i saw my teacher's face while he was explaining it, and she looked horrified. after he was done, and kids ended asking questions humoring his project, my professor said that he'd have to do the project again. he responded "why?" and she explained that he made a mockery of the assignment. "did you say that you would commit crimes in the scope of a 'national tragedy'? you use that term?" she said it wasn't funny, and the kid was arguing with her. it's funny because just a few weeks ago he changed his 'look.' he got a buzz cut, wears a baseball cap, green cargo pants and boots. he would write a treatment like that. i always liked him though. the room was really quiet and i didn't feel like being there. witnessing that argument gave me a bad feeling. it sort of ruined my day.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Castle of Mars


In tarot the the card assigned to mars is the tower. It means means structural damage, dramatic change and the crumbling and disintegration of the past. It is the shocking tragedy that somehow sweeps you away from your tragic life. Everything is dramatic, shocking, dangerous and wonderful.

Now we all know the real MARS is a pretty chill place, however, tragedy somehow did occur I'm sure it would sound something like that.

Friday, November 20, 2009

pigeons on the grass alas

b-blind item: this m.a.r.s. resident had an existential crisis when seeing h--self drinking a pabst blue ribbon tall boy and wearing an ironic t-shirt, all the while attending a williamsburg warehouse party. after realizing this, x remarked, "who am i?" it was a good night, though.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

heres some sick 1994 video by the crash test dummies hey weird all covers this shit you know!!

3 memebers of Mars experienced alien electric blue flashes that lit up the entire (b)east-side tonight was a meteor shower...the aliens were proabaly trying to communicate... we shall report back with our supernatural powerz next week.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Borrowed from the MJT

The Lives of Perfect Creatures

"All the universe is full of the lives of perfect creatures."

- Constantine Tsiolkovski

On November 3, 1957, just 30 days after the first ever man-made object entered into earth orbit, the Soviet Union launched a second "artificial moon." Born aloft by a proto-Vostok launch vehicle to an altitude of 934 miles, Sputnik II was not only substantially larger than its predecessor, but also differed in so far as its payload was not just limited to instrumentation and telemetry, but included a living being - the first ever earth-born creature to leave our planet and enter into the cosmic vacuum.This first earth-born creature to leave the earth was, of course, the famed Laika (barker), whose flight commanded the attention of the entire world. Between 1959 and 1961, 10 more dogs in 6 separate missions followed Laika's courageous example culminating in the flight of Zvezdochka (daughter of the stars), who, in the mute company of Ivan Ivanovich, a human mannequin, made a single orbit flight in final preparation for April 12, 1961, that historic day, when, proven tenable by the dogs, Yuri Gagarin was launched into space in the first human extra-terrestrial flight.The dogs of the space program were all female, mixed breeds found on the streets of Moscow. Selected for their size and temperament, the chosen dogs underwent extensive training by behaviorist Gregor Garzenko to enable them to withstand the tremendous noise, extreme motion, and severe forces of a Vostok rocket launch as well as to help them become accustomed to the pressurized suits and capsules necessary for extra-terrestrial travel.While Laika, as well as four subsequent canines and a rabbit, did not return from their travels, the majority of the missions were spectacularly successful. Belka (Whitey) and Strelka (Little Arrow), accompanied by 40 mice, 2 rats, and a number of plants, became the first beings to safely return from space after seventeen orbits of the planet. Strelka later gave birth to a litter of 6 healthy pups, one of whom was presented to the young Caroline Kennedy by Nikita Kruschev as a gift from the Soviet peoples.


We drank slowly when we thought empty was an erogenous zone we would be called upon to map. At our interdisciplinary height: our inhibitions. The thing we are best at doing everywhere is not doing. What we had wrapped tightly of the body talked itself up in all our favorite papers, our billboards, in our centers and our education, in our writing. I mean that highly accessible, popularized and permissible sex everywhere is the absence of sex anywhere. A representation is necessarily false. The erotic exists as its persecution does. And only when its persecution does. Protestantism in check is wonderful for sex (don't forget that both the classic catholic school girl fetish AND the daddy fetish are born of this particular constraint). Protestantism without its stick; unchecked and perverted into militant veganism (think abstinence, think lent), political martyrdom (Sacco and Vanzetti died for our sins) and cleanliness (workshops for hipsters on the proper way to sterilize our recycled-material, toxin-free vibrators).

Every time you eat a gluten-free, dildo-shaped cupcake, a young person looses their hard-on.
The R in MARS


Tuesday, November 10, 2009

If only mars knew you in wax too


4 da homegirls

for those of you who didn't accept "jem" in boggle

also, S., i got a laserdisc player and some silent soviet films on laserdisc today (on the blue chair). i thought a cool thing to do for fundraising would be 'lazer zeppelin on laser disc' nights where we could play live music to silent films on laserdisc.

Friday, November 6, 2009

didn't ask you to sing along

i think a boy in my class has a crush on me. i don't know what to do about that.

that girl who won't stop texting me threatened to shoot me if i didn't hang out with her. it was a joke, but it still made me feel uncomfortable.

i've always been on the opposite side, and i wouldn't have known i'd be in this position ever. when the feeling isn't mutual it really doesn't feel good. this situation sucks.

S-e-x-y 1-2-3-4


Wednesday, November 4, 2009

buggy expulsion


Monday, November 2, 2009

The mars team celebrates Halloween!

The adventures of Weird Sal, Bdork, Ace Ventura, and the Art Critic!


Thursday, October 29, 2009

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

sunday for m.a.r.s.


Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Monday, October 19, 2009

double decker bus

intergenerational moping

and a spanish lisp (lithp)

make me a mix if you got the time

Sunday, October 18, 2009

blind Item

Early Sunday evening X roommate was seen kissing the wall in the arts and crafts room. lips prints maybe seen.

Late Friday night Mars affiliate X spent 45 minutes trying to find M.A.R.S., walking around in the rain until realizing Bigelow and Yew are Parallel ...parallel UNIVERSES! ahhhh luckily they made it to our front door and we all went out for taca ensalada

Thursday, October 15, 2009

not a mark on it, blood squirted out

Leo's Truckstop Singers - Clumsy Andy
So if anyone was wondering I am in seattle and it rocks. Its weird in the big city, in the big city you are all alone. It is not you and the big city it is you in the big city wandering around trying to mingle. it is like two rocks mingling, there is no penetration and no face. me in the big city is like a pile of rocks. -m

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Blind Item

After roommate 1x found 1 nerd candy piece on the floor (and ate it) roommate x2 had to explain that giant boxes of NErds candy were on sale at the dollar store and that they ate the whole BOX in one DAY.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

rock n' roll is

a) older than sin

b) made on the 8th day

c) a drink you can't not pour in your wig

Saturday, October 10, 2009

sister act

i remember we were gonna watch Sister Act sometime, but i don't know if you already had. i need to do some chillin' (like a villain) before i go back to the school/work routine, and whoopi goldberg could certainly help with this.

here's the original "i will follow him"
i don't know french, but i think the song's about imperialism

another rendition in another language

ps: a few days ago at media loan this woman told me that she might dress up as whoopi goldberg again this halloween, but she wasn't sure because it might offend people. she said a past halloween someone thought she was actually a black woman. she was white. maybe i should've told her that black face wasn't cool.

Monday, October 5, 2009

Sunday, October 4, 2009

slangy slangy

6. Cougar 355 up, 129 down love it hate it

Coo-gher. An older woman who's primary interest lies in bedding younger men. Often, but not necessarily, with money; cougars are the more aggressive variety of the commonly used term: milf.
I think that cougar just grabbed my ass!


Calling roommates M. and A. will you please report to the fridge and drop off your rent check made out to S. so we may can pay rent tomorrow it is out last chance. thank you

Saturday, October 3, 2009

keebird country

blind item - dream journal edition

Last night this M.A.R.S. resident dreamt that all hir roommates took hir to a Twilight convention somewhere in Washington. X was kinda weirded out, but decided to go anyways, by force. It was a really nice drive and there were some modern abstract rock sculptures along the way, by the little bridge in the town. While X's roommates mingled with other Twilight fans, a girl walked up to X and talked about the politics and social issues of Twilight. X acted like ze'd read the book.

Thursday, October 1, 2009

grocery list

i'm hungry and have no groceries. me and M. are going shopping today. we might take a long time, but it's nice to carpool, especially on a rainy day. we'll hit up the groç out, then the co-op, and some other places maybe.

grocs (topographical list)
1. tempeh mountain
2. extra firm tofu pyramid
3. low sodium tamari river
4. bok choy national forest
5. the kale-kegaard museum
6. dave's killer badlands
7. brown rice desert
8. salad bowl
9. broccoli peninsula
10. yellow onion mountain tops
11. garrrlic island
12. canned structures
13. soy ice cream canyon
13.5 chocolate milk creek
and other stuff.

we're off.

S. Weekly Agenda

Hey this is what I do Potential Carpool oppurtunities starting end of October.

Sunday: rotational work from 12-4
Monday: Work 10-2
Tuesday: Work 10-2 Class 6-9:30
Wednedsay: Class 9-12 Work 2-8
Thursday: Work 10-2 Class 6- 9:30
Friday: Class 9-5
Saturday: Off

Monday, September 28, 2009

Last night X was so high when attempting to brush her teeth she put toothpaste in her contact case. Luckily her eyes are minty fresh this morning.

Sunday, September 27, 2009

new post

we've all been very busy this week.

i tried looking for some cool segway videos, but they were all lame. this video-art is genius though. please give it a try.

i've been really into stairs lately, and that reminded me about this video i saw at the pdx film festival.

Equanimous Passage from Orland Nutt on Vimeo.

also, everyone should watch the new lazer zeppelin video on their blog. it's nice.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Just so everyone knows I love my new family and I'm excited to create new memories together.


Jhon [sic] Huston's Wise Blood (1979). 108 min. DVD. Based on Flannery O'Connor's novel.

Lars von Trier's Antichrist (2009). 109 min.

you should come watch these with us, or some of us.

today's blind item

1. this m.a.r.s. affiliate fell asleep at the vacuum. it's a good thing we can't afford cars. chorez r hharde

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Blind Item for Sunday, September 20th:

1. This neighborhood is hairier than we thought. X got barfed at by a local crusty on her way to work. The suspect was chanting "drunk punk! drunk punk!" as his projectile dribbled forth onto the driveway. Watch out for the black house on Marion.

2. No one else did anything cool today, or get drunk.

3. X went for a long bike ride and accidentally ended up in Lacey. The geography in the Puget Sound is such that if you head up hill, no matter the direction, you will eventually end up in Lacey.

Watch out for our subsidiary; SprayPaintItGold.Com
It has come to pass that what once defined analog (permanence), may hold a bit more true for digital. What we mean is that a dry erase board may be erased. So, here is our list of reasons to go to MEXICO. Additions welcome. Oh, and be sure to attend upcoming LAZERZEPPLIN fundraisers, intended to get the band to our friendly southern neighbor.

1. UFO's
2. Food
3. La Virgen
4. Cheap Kornrows
5. The Economy
6. Cheap Negra Modelo
7. Cheese
8. La Fiesta
9. Surrealist Art
10. Five Dying Pandas at the Mexico City Zoo
11. The Pharmacies
12. Mexico City
13. Oaxaca
14. Souvenirs
15. Street Food
16. Secret Pyramid Portals
17. telenovela stars
18.Ska is still cool. (so is emo)
19. Cheap dental care
20. Weird motels
21. Shrines
22. The way that women's pants look in real tight jeans
23. Mota and hongos
24. Teletubbies merch is still cheap/widely available

this week's blind items

1. Although these m.a.r.s. neighbors made a name for themselves as major sticklers when they called the cops on m.a.r.s. residents not once but twice, it seems as if this prudish behavior is just a front for their wilder swinger lifestyle. This week they were spotted dancing in front of their windows as the television flashed its gentle blue light over their 'unique', pastry-less living room. Oh my!

2. This future northeast Olympia resident has the nose of a coyote (kahy-oht). During his most recent visit he sniffed out and identified a certain 'groovy' plant growing unexpectedly in the Yew and Central area. We can only speculate who planted it.

3. When the party gets rough, the rough party --this is a popular idiom a certain m.a.r.s. resident can relate to too well. At a recent show in the downtown area, x drank too many alcoholic energy beverages and too much malt liquor, so much so that x reportedly acted "sassy" towards a well-known Olympia entrepreneur, and wanted to start a fight with its good friend/bakesman. During the following days, x made efforts to apologize to everyone offended by its behaviour. How embarrassing!

if you have any blind items you want to contribute, or if you have ethical concerns regarding this section of the blog, please let us know, as we're always interested in hearing from our readership.

vagina dance

if you take the time to watch it you should watch it through the end

Saturday, September 19, 2009

okay guys help me pick out my outfit and hairdo today
im going for something daytime/casual but that will get me noticed.
tell me what you think?